You often struggle with how to help your HSC move about their day when their worries are HUGE all the dang time. It makes sense, then, that your go-to is ‘let’s talk about it later’ or ‘ think happy thoughts to distract you.’
You hope that your child will forget about what’s bothering them, and genuinely, you’ve seen it happen before, so it’s not always a delay tactic because you’re not in the mood/feeling confused how to handle it/have no time to spend 20 minutes on this/just don’t feel like it/your other kid needs to eat (have bum wiped/wants to lick your face/poke the dog in the eye…you name it).
But then there are the times when it royally backfires, leaving you wiped out and with bald patches where you (metaphorically I hope) yanked out all of your hair.
The truth is, most of the time your child is not ‘forgetting about it’. With a mind wired to move faster and use more of its power ALL OF THE TIME, your child is just learning to stuff the worry or hide it from you because he notices it’s not the right time for you to hear it.
Look, I get it, life needs to go on, AND your HSC needs a time to decompress. These two things are true at the same time. They can’t cancel each other out. If they do, you’re teaching your HSC to ‘grin and bear it’ which leads to greater consequences later on: a meltdown about pajamas, refusal to take a shower, TWO HOURS to fall asleep after unloading all the worries, and worse: destructive, unpredictable, unhealthy behavior as a teen is sure to come.
Your child needs a daily opportunity to chill. The details of this will look differently for every family, but I know for certain that my team can support you in figuring out how to make this happen even if you have a million plans scheduled this week.
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