Growing up, I wasn’t a highly sensitive child …

But I was the sibling of a highly sensitive child.

See, people often wonder why I got into the work I do at MTC.

And while it’s because my passion truly is helping parents and kids in this situation, it’s also down to my personal experience.

I want to preface this by saying that I have an amazing relationship with my parents.

They’re kind, loving people, and we get on great.

But looking back, knowing what I know now, there were things in my childhood that definitely weren’t optimal, and had a negative impact on me as I grew up.

That’s why I wanted to write today’s blog.

Parenting an HSC is super tough.

Parenting an HSC and a non-HSC is even tougher.

Because it’s such a balancing act.

And clearly, you can’t use the exact same strategy for both kids.

So what can you do?

Well, let me share with you the 4 “lessons” I learned being parented in a traditional household...

Something that comes up a LOT in my Facebook group is judgment.

We get parents posting almost every day about how family members simply can’t stop criticizing or passing comments on their parenting styles.

Which sucks.

Because there you are, doing the work needed to help your kiddo end the meltdown cycle, develop vital social skills, and grow into a calm, confident young adult …

And you’re getting unnecessary comments from others who feel the need to get involved!

Now, I want to preface this by saying, I understand why family members can be critical.

I mean, we all go on our own journeys, right?

And when something is a little bit ‘different’ it can be scary.

But at the same time, feeling like others judge you just isn’t nice.

It can make you second guess and doubt yourself.

So to help you out with this, I wanted to explain the 3 main reasons why your family might be upset with your shift in parenting style.

First up, they simply don’t...

Being the parent of a teenager is never easy.

But when your teen is highly sensitive …

Well, that adds a whole other level of complexity.

If you’re a parent of a teen though, and you read my post last week about the importance of consistency with highly-sensitive kids, maybe you’re thinking -

“Well, Megghan’s advice there should work for us, too.”

Stop right now!

There’s a BIG difference between the 3 things parents of younger kids need to do for consistency, compared to parents of teens.

That’s why, if you have a kid between 13 and 19 (or even just a little outside of this range,) you need to read today’s blog carefully.

Because I’m about to reveal the 3 consistency traps that keep teen parents stuck.

Trap #1: Parents Not Being on the Same Page

With most things in your relationship, one spouse will take more of an active role.

Whether it’s things like household chores …

Buying groceries …

Or home...

Does the following sound familiar:

You read some advice about managing meltdowns.

Maybe it’s something from one of my Facebook lives …

Maybe it’s in an online forum …

Or maybe you pick up a new strategy from a podcast or book.

You try this advice, and, whadda ya know … It works!

Your kiddo is calmer, more controlled, and the meltdowns reduce …

… for a week or two.

Then, before you know it, things are right back where they were. Or possibly, even worse.

And this strategy that worked so well just a few weeks ago?

Well, now it’s as good as useless!

If that sounds like you, this is super common.

In fact, I rarely meet a parent who’s never had any success with reducing the meltdown cycle.

But nearly everyone I speak to has had some short-term success, and got their hopes up, only to then go right back to square one, and not know why.

And that’s because it’s difficult to work out what is and isn’t working when...

Ever feel like no matter what you do, you just can’t get through to your kid?

You’ve read all the books …

Tried all the tactics …

And diligently stick to everything you should be doing …

But whenever you try to speak to them about emotions, they clam up?

If so … Welcome to the world of parenting an HSC :)

I’m not saying all HSCs are difficult to talk to about emotions.

But the majority are.

And that can lead parents to feeling disheartened, disillusioned, and like there’s no point even trying.

Many think outsourcing emotional regulation to a therapist is the only choice.

So they ask around, go for multiple assessments, and spend a small fortune on sessions for their kiddo, which do …

Absolutely nothing!

See, there can be a time and a place for therapy.

But emotional regulation isn’t it.

I know how common it is for parents to struggle to talk with HSCs about emotion.

But there’s also a way you can get through to...

As parents, our number one priority is to make sure our kids feel safe at all times.

But when you’re parenting an HSC, that’s easier said than done.

Especially when you’re stuck in the meltdown cycle.

Because let’s face it, your primal instinct is to get them out of this spot ASAP.

We don’t want to see our kiddo hurting, and struggling to express their emotions.

And we definitely don’t want them to feel unsafe.

And so more often than not, we become their safe space.

Now, a ‘safe space’ can mean a lot of different things for different HSCs.

For some, that means having plenty of human contact, to help them feel supported and loved.

Others may be more sensitive to physical touch, and so for them, a safe space is more about simply having you near.

In most cases, if you can provide whatever safe space is needed FOR THEM, that particular meltdown will end sooner.

But there’s a problem …

Because while this strategy might be...

If your kiddo is like most at this time of year, the last thing they’ll want is to be outside.

Chances are, they’ll have their head buried deep in a phone …

Wasting hours on some games console …

Or just staring blankly at the TV for hours.

And while they might seem perfectly content doing this, so much time spent indoors -- particularly time in front of screens -- is one of the worst things for their mood.

I know, for most of us, January is dark and miserable.

The buzz of the holidays feels long gone.

And you’re probably not motivated to get outside much yourself.

Especially if it’s wet, windy and cold.

But spending time in the fresh air and nature can genuinely do wonders for your kiddo’s mental health.

Not to mention yours, too!

Our clients at MTC know this.

We speak with so many parents at this time of year who say they expected their HSCs to calm down a little after the holidays, and get back into their routine …

Only to find...

Suicide isn’t a comfortable topic to talk about.

Especially when talking about suicide in kids and teens.

But it’s something I feel I need to cover.

Because shockingly, a recent CDC report showed that suicide rates have increased 195% since 1990.

And that’s not all.

In youths aged 5-19, self-harm has also risen by a staggering 411%.

And in children aged 5-12, suicide is now the 5th leading cause of death.

I know hearing this might make you uncomfortable.

And it should.

It certainly does me.

But we can’t just brush this issue under the carpet.

After all, resistance to speaking about suicide and self-harm in children and teens is likely one of the reasons these rates have continued to climb.

And sure, there are other factors involved as well …

But a reluctance to talk won’t have helped.

Self-harm and suicide risks are very real.

In fact, barely a week goes by when my team and I don’t speak to a parent who’s already found evidence...

Whenever I speak to parents in January, they tell me one thing -

“I feel like I need another break already.

That vacation was hardly worth it.”

Which is sad.

Because we all want to enjoy our downtime, appreciate our family over the holidays, and go into the New Year feeling upbeat and optimistic.

But as a parent of an HSC, that’s often the last thing you feel.

Because despite best intentions, the holiday season was stressful.

Maybe your kid acted out more than usual …

You had to leave family parties early as they got so stressed …

Or the change in routine completely threw them off, and it was “meltdown o’clock” every single day!

Whatever it was, as cliche as it is to say …

New Year is a GREAT time to set new goals and make a commitment to calming the chaos and eliminating the meltdowns.

Trouble is, you feel like you’re facing this huge uphill battle.

All those routines you worked so hard to put in place in the fall after...

Are you tired of feeling frustrated and helpless when it comes to your child's aggressive behavior? 

Do you feel like you've tried everything from traditional parenting techniques to yelling and rewards, but nothing seems to work?

Here at MTC we understand how difficult and stressful it can be to deal with a child who is exhibiting aggressive behavior. 

It can take a toll on your relationship with your child and with your partner, causing arguments and tension. 

But there is hope.

Just look at what happened with Jamie and John and their 7-year-old HSC. 

They had tried everything they could think of (sticker charts, rewards, yelling, counting to 3…), but nothing seemed to work. 

They were struggling to manage his aggressive behavior and meltdowns, and they found themselves constantly arguing with each other about how to handle the situation. 

It was especially difficult for them because their HSC’s twin sister was managing her emotions much...