Do you ever feel embarrassed by your kid’s behavior?
If so … You’re not alone.
Being embarrassed is a normal part of parenting.
But with an HSC, that embarrassment can be on another level.
Not only do embarrassing situations crop up more frequently …
They can also be way more intense.
So it’s normal to spend a lot of your time feeling red-faced, ashamed, and worrying that everyone’s looking at you.
Or worse … Judging you.
Believe me, here at my coaching practice, we’ve heard it all.
From kids ramming carts into displays when grocery shopping, because they didn’t get their way …
To having screaming incidents in the middle of church …
Or even cursing at random strangers.
And, while most kids grow out of this naturally, that’s definitely not the case with HSCs.
Even the smaller stuff, like refusing to compete in sports, or not showing you any affection while other kids are giving their Moms and Dads hugs and kisses can make you embarrassed.
Because you might feel like you’re letting them down, right?
Or maybe you think others see you as a ‘bad parent.’
Or more likely a mix of both.
Look, being embarrassed when your kid has a meltdown doesn’t mean you love them any less.
In fact, it shows you only want the best for them.
You want them to succeed, to thrive, and to fit in, while still being their amazing self.
That’s why it’s important to acknowledge your own embarrassment, realize it’s okay, and then, rather than trying to eliminate it … Working out what you can do in these situations.
So where do we start with clients?
Well, the first step is getting them to see how the worst thing they can do is showing or telling their child they’re embarrassed by them.
Remember, HSCs can be triggered by excessive emotions.
So if they’re already feeling stressed, anxious, or embarrassed themselves, knowing that you also feel embarrassed is only going to make their meltdown worse.
This is a great first step.
But while it helps, it doesn’t totally stop these incidents.
And definitely not right away.
So chances are, while you’re working on this, you’re still going to feel like other parents or strangers are judging you. And that’s tough.
Sure, some are laser-focused, don’t get riled by others’ opinions, and know if they’re doing what they need for their kid, they’re good.
Whereas others still feel intensely embarrassed or humiliated, despite knowing there’s an end in sight.
If that’s you, then seeking out coaching for yourself isn’t the worst idea in the world.
If it allows you to better cope with your kiddo, so you can support them rather than stressing about your own feelings, that’s a win, right?
Because when you let go of your own embarrassment …
You can tackle the cause of their meltdown. Whether it’s not feeling seen, not feeling understood, feeling unsafe, or any number of things.
And that means you eventually eliminate these, and any potential embarrassment.
Despite this though, one thing we hear a lot at MTC is -
“But Megghan, it’s not strangers’ opinions that bother me … But I feel like my family’s constantly judging my kid’s behavior.”
This is a tough one.
Because quite honestly, I don’t know your family dynamic.
It may be the case that you can take 10-15 minutes to talk to a few close family members, explain the situation, your unique challenges, and how it’s important everyone is on the same page …
And that solves it.
I’ve seen that happen many times before.
And it’s amazing what an open, empathetic conversation can do, to solve years of arguing, judging and friction.
Unfortunately though, it’s not always that simple.
Some of our clients and some of the parents in our free Facebook group have ended up severing ties with judgemental family members.
That should never be a first port of call.
But sometimes it is the necessary last resort.
While it was tough for them, they’ve told me that getting rid of toxic family members has been like a breath of fresh air, and allowed them to finally parent their kiddo with honesty, integrity, and without fear of being shamed.
So that one’s on you!
The only thing I’d say is, your kiddo MUST come first.
So if other family members are holding them back, or making them worse …
It might be time to do some serious thinking about who you’re associating with.
I know, it’s not an easy decision.
But then what decisions are easy when parenting an HSC?
Well, hopefully this one …
The decision to book a call with us.
This is your first step to dialing down the drama, and putting an end to the meltdowns and arguments.
Whatever your problem, we’ve seen it, and we know how to overcome it.
One of my team members or I will be more than happy to help.
Click t he link below, pick a day and time that suits you, and let’s start working on helping your kiddo.
Book a call with my team today: https://www.megghanthompsoncoaching.com/talk
For families with high school aged teens: https://www.megghanthompsoncoaching.com/teentalk